Monthly Archives: June 2014

Body Work, Part I: Talking to My Toes

The past few weeks have been very rewarding, both in terms of my own healing work and in working with my body.

After my post about working with my body elemental, we reached a truce. My body elemental talked to me in stops and starts. It seemed he did want to have a relationship but I could understand why he was hesitant. We talk infrequently now. I get the idea that he is feeling me out to see if I’m sincere about working together. Continue reading


Why I am Grateful to Feel Suicidal

I feel awful.

I am depressed.

I am having suicidal thoughts.

I am considering revisiting some old behaviors I haven’t done in many years.

Today is day two of this experience. Continue reading

I Have Expectations

I have expectations.

Even when I want to stay present (and my mind thinks I’ve been doing a pretty good job) I have rampant expectations.

I am sitting enjoy my first drink of the day of warm water and lemon. I’m still sleepy, enjoying the sounds of chirping birds and thinking of what I’d like to do today.

I reach for my mug and take a sip.

Yuck! Continue reading

2014-06-12 Update/ Message from Angel Class

I am so excited!

I have to get this out before I head to bed or it will bounce around in my head all night. I am home from my angel class with the very bright and amazing Rita Strough. I cannot say enough wonderful things about her and not just because she was the messenger for tonight.

For the sake of brevity, I will just say that my personal signs and messages lately have revolved around the phoenix, dragonflies and the ocean. On a personal level, I’ve been overwhelmed this week with the upcoming full moon but was given some insights today which have given me new perspective on how I’ve been thinking about things and it has made for a miraculous turnaround. The sadness has diminished but not passed and I’ve been working with my tender heart via Pema Chodron’s shenpa practice. It has been amazing.

Continue reading

Personal Creative Power and Divine Will

I woke up this morning thinking about creating, our creative power and Divine will.  In particular about some closure I was given recently regarding my two miscarriages.

Presently, I have one child born from this body. My seven year old son is a source of joy and constant learning. He keeps me busy! The dragon has an eight year old son who is with us every other weekend but spends the rest of his time with his mother who lives three states away.

I’ve been with the dragon for five years now and my mother called this week to ask what we were doing for our second wedding anniversary. Evidently it is tomorrow. I didn’t know. I don’t keep track of it.

Continue reading


There is nothing to fight.

There is no evil.

Masked light has taken on the heaviest shroud to give us opportunities to shine.

And I am eternally grateful they do.

I will not waste this gift. 

I bow in earnest thanks for their sacrifice.

I love the dark.